Creative writing · epilepsy · Living with Epilepsy · My work · Seizure · The seizure queen · Uncategorized

I’m tired of being tired

I’m tired of being tired

Try not to let it bring you down.
Try not to give up hope.
Try not to let it affect your dreams.
Try not to let it win.

Make the most of what you have.
Be thankful, it could be worse.
But, you look so normal.
You will get better.

Tell me, do you deal with what I do?
Answer this, can you drive?
Tell me, are you scared to be alone?
Answer this, do you lose yourself?

Don’t tell me it could be worse,
I know.
Don’t tell me I will get better,
I won’t.
Don’t tell me to be thankful,
I know
Don’t tell me to not let it win,
I won’t.

Sometimes, it brings me down.
Sometimes, I give up hope.
Sometimes, it effects my dreams.
Sometimes, it wins.

Sometimes, I have a good day.
Sometimes, I stay safe.
Sometimes, I’m grateful for them.
Sometimes, I win.

Because of it, I cannot drive.
Because of it, I’m scared.
Because of it, I cannot do all I want to do.
Because of it, I’m not always the best version of me!

Because of it, I understand more deeply.
Because of it, I love more openly.
Because of it, I live more passionately.
Because of it, I appreciate more.

I’m tired of fighting,
I’m tired of of being sad,
I’m tired of feeling useless,
I’m tired of missing things,
I’m tired of being angry,
I’m tired of pretending,
I’m tired of hurting,
I’m tired of dreaming of a life I’ll never have?
I’m tired of feeling lost,
But most of all, I’m tired of being tired.

 

The Seizure Queen

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